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fuckyeahfinalfantasy2010-09-27 01:43 am
sexychocobo) wrote in fuckyeahfinalfantasy2010-09-27 01:43 am
FYFF: MISSION ONE, ACCEPT Y/N?
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Re: FFVIII, Seifer/Squall, your words are all over me (3/3)
(Anonymous) 2010-10-03 05:52 pm (UTC)(link)The moon is full and bright when Seifer and Squall head down the street, weeks into the surreal joke that Seifer's life has become. It's immaculate and nothing like the neighborhood they live in. All the houses, fucking huge houses, are dark around them, and the street lights have already dimmed to a soft glow. Rich people don't need street lights not to get mugged, and they can afford blackout curtains.
"Why are we here?" Squall slurs it a little. Seifer is more than a little drunk, pissed off about it, and even more pissed because he thought maybe for once Squall wouldn't follow him. But that's not happening anymore. Rinoa fucking broke him, and Seifer bought the merchandise, and here they are.
"Her house is there," he says, pointing ahead, and he doesn't bother with the question.
Seifer knows how to listen. He works in a nice place, and the owners either don't know who he is or are acting like they don't, and he gets along with them. No waves, no missed shifts, no problems, so they treat him like a nonentity, and he knows how to listen and watch. He's not sure how Rinoa managed to keep her visit to her father a secret. He's not sure how she got in to the city, stayed four whole days in her childhood home, and then got out again with not even a peep from the press. He wonders if she's done it before. He also wonders if she looked for Squall, since he was antsy and frenzied the whole time she was in the city, burning with something like a fever and desperate for Seifer to touch him. Seifer doesn't want to dwell on that.
He suspects some sort of fucked up sorceress magic, silencing the people she interacted with, if she's driving Squall bonkers being in the same city. It wouldn't be stranger than anything else.
Seifer stays away for a week, but now she's gone, back to Timber and the restoration, and he's going to see if she's changed.
He ducks down an alley at the end of the block, and it leads to a service access streets and high, locked gates to the gardens and showy patios. Seifer finds the right one, halfway down, and picks the padlock with ease. Squall is a ever-growing tension at his back.
It's like walking into his own house. Spare key: underneath the loose brick in the patio. Security code: same as it was during his wild summer with Rinoa, coming in at all hours.
"What are we doing?" Squall asks. "This is crazy."
"No crazier than me putting my tongue in your ass, shut up." Seifer likes how Squall flushes, a flash of heat at his back. For all that Squall imagines Rinoa when they fuck, he still reacts to Seifer's voice, like a puppet. That's another problem Seifer's not interested in exploring right now, if ever.
The house is silent around them, and Seifer knows how to get to Rinoa's rooms through the back stairs, knows each stair that creeps and every loose board that will groan under weight. It comes back to him, like he lives here. Squall follows his lead and says nothing until they're in Rinoa's room, door shut behind them.
Seifer doesn't turn on the light. Squall breathes heavily, back against the door. It smells like her here, the soft scent she uses that was her mother's. It reminds Seifer of ripe peaches, the kind that came out of Winhill in the summer.
"Did we come here to..." Squall pauses. "Are you punishing me? Is that what this is?"
Seifer grabs the chair from the desk. "No, although maybe I should." He lines it up with the vent at the top of the wall, and steps up. The screw is already loose, and Seifer smiles. Predictable. It's easy to twirl it with his fingers, slide the cover off, and reach inside. They notebooks are in layers, toward the back so no one could see them from the floor, and he feels around for the one on the top, closet to him.
When he steps down, Squall is next to him. "What is that?"
"Secrets of the Sorcesses," Seifer said. "I could probably embarrass her into combusting into a shower of fairies if I took these to the press. Sadly, she'd know who did it and come kill me with her brain, or something." He hands the notebook over. It's full — there's no ribbon marking the page.
"This is her journal," Squall says. He holds it like it's a bar of gold. "I've seen her write in these."
"And she still brings them back here when they're full," Seifer says. "Smart, really. She's political capital, yet she's still writing all her thoughts down. Caraway isn't someone you fuck with, so she hides them here, from everyone else in the world." Seifer leans against the wall. "Privacy, right? That thing she tried to give you, and fucked it up."
"Why are you showing me this?" Squall asks. His voice is whisper-light.
"Because when I fuck you, you say her name," Seifer says. "You come faster when I talk about shit she used to do to me, when I do it to you. You're in love with the girl, and I've never really been great at sharing." He gestures at the book. "This is closure, or maybe not closure. I don't care what she says. You probably do. So open it and get it over with."
Squall runs fingers across the cover and walks to the window. Rinoa's balcony is beyond, the sheer curtains drawn across the doors. Rinoa had joked that Caraway had given her that room as a taunt, since it would have been a great escape route, except for the thorny bushes he had put in. Rinoa had called him a bastard, but Seifer knew she admired it at least a little. She liked smart people.
Seifer doesn't watch Squall read the journal in the light from the window. He goes and stretches out across Rinoa's bed. Across the hall, Caraway is snoozing in his fucking king size, none the wiser. Rinoa's bed is better than his.
He dozes, a little, and blinks awake when Squall sits down on the edge of the bed.
"Done?" Seifer says. His voice is thick.
Squall nods, and then surprises the hell out of Seifer by stretching out beside him, pressing their mouths together. They're both still drunk enough for this to be a terrible idea, but Seifer doesn't care. Squall still lets Seifer turn him over, and they fuck in silence Rinoa's bed, on her perfect covers, and and when Seifer sucks Squall's cock down his throat as he comes, Seifer finally hears his name.
Seifer doesn't ask what was in the journal. They put things back in order, then leave the way they came, and they never talk about it.
Squall stops saying Rinoa's name. Seifer doesn't read anything into it, and they keep fucking, so why not. It's getting colder and he likes waking up in his frigid room with Squall plastered to him.
Even then, he's not surprised when he walks out of work one morning after the first snow and finds Irvine and Quistis waiting for him instead of Squall. He thinks back to the morning, how Squall blinked awake when Seifer sat up, and Seifer gave in and kissed him, sour breath and all, and told him to go back to sleep instead of walking him to work. He's somehow ridiculously glad he got that much.
"Come to take him home, eh?" He sits on the steps, which are fucking freezing. "She figured out how to fix him?"
"We think so," Quistis says. "We won't know for sure, but she's come to the city a few times in the last few weeks, and he hasn't been odd, right? She said he's felt normal."
Seifer snorts. "Why bother asking? You know already, right?" He tucks his hands into his armpits, and he tries to think back, remember any tails. He doesn't, but he's not surprised. "You've been watching him since the beginning."
Irvine shook his head. "No, we stopped once he took up with you. We figured he'd be safe enough."
"Whose genius idea was that?"
"Zell's, actually." Quistis's voice is cooler than ice, daring him to make a crack. "He got his hands on Odine's research. He suspected that what was done to you might actually help Squall from losing it. He said there's some research about knight-bonding that looked promising. We decided to trust him."
"How nice of you all to use me," Seifer says. "Did Squall know?"
Quistis and Irvine share a look. "He wasn't in much of a state to know," Quistis said. "He's the one who wanted to get away. We just chose the place."
"Rinoa is not happy about you letting Squall read her diary, by the way," Irvine says, and he sounds amused. "Or fucking him, but she says she doesn't really blame you."
"How magnanimous." He thinks about his life, the last few months of it. He maybe hasn't been happy, but it had been something. "Well, tell him to have a nice life, I guess. If that's all, it's fucking freezing and I'm going home." He heads off, but Quistis's voice makes him pause.
"He said he'll come back." Quistis stares at him hard. "He asked us to tell you."
Seifer meets her eyes. "If it works, he better not come back," he says. "It's one thing, when they're split, it's another, when it's pity." He grins. "I won't cry too much," he says, and he leaves them standing in the cold.
Knowledge changes everything. Seifer lives and he tries to forget. He's pretty good at it, except Quistis's words knaw at him in the middle of the night when he's freezing and his heater has gone out again. He figures it out a week after Squall's been gone, and he's so lonely it hurts. He thinks to what she said: she said he's felt normal, and how they knew, they knew about the sex and the diary, and he'd been so fucking stupid.
Rinoa knows everything. She was with Squall the entire time, every single thing Seifer had that he thought was his, and his only, no more sharing. What's worse, is that Squall read the diary. Seifer imagines that he knew, too, and that's where all the fondness came from, Seifer's name torn from his mouth instead of Rinoa's. Permission granted from the boss. Seifer can't decide whether it's shame or lust or something else, but he strokes himself to it and comes so hard he sees white and it's ridiculous. He's pathetic and pissed off and he wishes he could get to her to throttle her.
Of course, he doesn't have to get to her. She comes to him.
He knows when she comes into the bar because the whole place goes so silent it's like they've also stopped breathing, and maybe they have. Seifer tosses back the last of his drink.
"Ah, two weeks, huh?" He doesn't turn around. "Figured it would be longer than that."
"Just as pleasant as ever," she says, and sits beside him. Her hair is longer, and her face sharper, older. "Are you miserable and lonely yet?"
Seifer meets her eyes. "Well, your genius bond researcher sent your broken knight to another broken knight, didn't he? Why don't you tell me how I'm feeling? You can do that by now, I assume."
Her smile is sneaky, but fond. "He does feel a little bad about it," she says. "But not too much."
"Let me guess, he laughed so hard he fell off something, and then rolled around, laughing." Seifer rolled his eyes. "He's laughing right now, too."
"Probably." Rinoa lays a hand on his shoulder. She's not dressed for the weather, at all, but then, all her bare arms and perfect, pale skin conceal so much magic she could probably power the entire city. Seifer feels like he's on fucking fire where her palm is, but also more relaxed than he's been in weeks. It feels like home, like it does when Squall is pressed against him, pliant and soft. "I am sorry. You didn't even ask. You didn't even know."
"What's a little non consensual bonding between ex-lovers?" He is suddenly trapped between wanting to laugh and cry. It's a strange feeling and he's not sure he likes it. "How's Squall feel about it?"
She doesn't answer at all, but instead pulls him forward. Her lips are cool on his cheek. He feels wrecked. It's different from the last time, though. Warmer. "Come home, Seifer," she says. "I'll let you have kinky sex with our boyfriend, promise."
He looks at her, tiny and small and gorgeous and full of magic that's already tangled up with his. He sighs, and says, "Oh, well. Why the hell not."
Re: FFVIII, Seifer/Squall, your words are all over me (3/3)
(Anonymous) 2010-10-05 04:21 am (UTC)(link)this.. i. this.
hi. this is wordless me. loving this.
Re: FFVIII, Seifer/Squall, your words are all over me (3/3)
(Anonymous) 2010-10-05 01:55 pm (UTC)(link)Re: FFVIII, Seifer/Squall, your words are all over me (3/3)
(Anonymous) 2010-10-11 01:10 am (UTC)(link)Re: FFVIII, Seifer/Squall, your words are all over me (3/3)
(Anonymous) 2011-05-22 07:18 pm (UTC)(link)It is absolutely wonderful. Would you mind if I translate it into my native language? Keeping all the credits, of course. Please?
Re: FFVIII, Seifer/Squall, your words are all over me (3/3)
I am so glad you liked the story and want to translate it. Thank you so much. ♥
Re: FFVIII, Seifer/Squall, your words are all over me (3/3)